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So This is it?

If You Lived Here, You'd be Home By Now

19 February
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Now this is a story all about how my life got twisted upside down and id like to take a minute just sit right there ill tell you how i became the the guy whose typing right here. In west Philadelphia born and raised on the playground my momma said most of my days chilling out, maxing and relaxing all cool and something, something, something, outside of school when a couple of guys they were up to no good started making trouble in our neighborhood. I got in one little fight and my mom got scared but then I got drafted and sent to Vietnam.

1972, I along side a crack commando unit was sent to prison by a military court for a crime we didn't commit. After promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Still wanted by the government, we survived as soldiers of fortune. If you had a problem, if no one else can help, and if you could find us, maybe you could hire the A-Team. But after not receiving payment for series of missions and having to put up with BA's constant bitching I left the A-Team. On the street alone, with no marketable skills besides my soft sweet lips I sold myself as a guinea pig for a New York based physics lab.

Things were sweet for awhile, then one of the scientist (RICHARRRRDDSS!) made a miscalculation (forgot to carry the one)and I was blasted into the future. There I leaped from life to life, putting things right, that once went wrong and hoping each time, that the next leap will be the leap home. Then I ended up in the body of a Reservist Sailor living in Arizona and I fucked up the thing I was supposed to do. So I ran, I ran so far away. I just had to get away.

After training as a ninja in Central Asia and a brief stint as a vigilante on the east coast I ended up going to southern California. There I once again sold my body to science. During one experiment I was exposed to gamma radiation which caused me to swell up in to a monstrous muscle bound freak whenever I get upset. Hunted by a relentless reporter I spend my time on the run. Trying to control the monster and I have an alien friend who eats cats.
17th century hair metal, chewing gum, christian gansta-rap, damn you richarrds!, fire-starting, ghost riding, horrmance, irony, islamic chants, kicking ass, movie based coloring books, peeing, sounds of the rainforest, the dark arts, time-travel